by myself

I am trapped in an intolerable sameness
My mind, a weapon firing the same bullet over and over–
killing everything I wake for each day
Trapped in life’s jungle, a purgatory for lost hunters–
those who know where they should be perched–
but can never climb high enough
Earth hardens me, heaven humbles me
Trapped in between, I stare down at God and up at the devil
So much transpires, lustful living chokes out the meek
Promises break, chambers are emptied
Nothing springs back, nothing returns–

nothing, until him
His disarming gunmetal eyes–a grey so pure–
he surely has stolen pigment from Saturn’s rings
My weakest points give way to his bare arms
He becomes what I had prayed for
My spirit rekindles, like a weary grizzly in heat
Freed, my slumbering heart rises from its hibernation
His words turn my winter breath into spring air
Every moving part of his powerful anatomy, targets me–
He parlays brilliant charm and overtakes my trust

Sometime later, the camouflage fades
The sun breaks through the dense canopy
I observe him from a new position–
watching while he is unaware
My mind returns to restless oblivion
There is, I will admit here, a sense of comfort in the chaos
Around me, the entire world stampedes in unison
And I know I can survive by myself




11 thoughts on “by myself

    • I’d give anything to be lonely 😊 I’m anything but – my home is loaded to the gills with people and whenever I go out the front door- there are more of them (people) outside😉
      I sometimes ‘worry’ about what I write about and how I write it – often – my words are conjured from alter egos – nothing that is actually transpiring in my life – my life is pretty darn good and I’m happy 87.239% of the time 😄but I thank you, John for the concern
      and I’m happy you are happy too!

      Liked by 1 person

      • good news for me over 85% of the time😉
        3 times you say – well, then ’tis true, my good friend – 3 times is a charm – and you are leading a charmed life –
        I will admit, John – I do sometimes miss the years as a single soul – the salt & pepper was always where I left it last 😊

        Liked by 1 person

  1. An intriguing poem, AM, another sendable in my book. So many (too many) lines to cite as favs, so let me just say that last stanza is especially sublime for its voyeuristic stance and turns the poem on its furry, attentive, catlike ear. (Art wunderbar as well, my friend.) Lovely.

    Liked by 1 person

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