Forgive me, dear women who were fifty

Please accept my apologies
dear women who were fifty
when I was twenty
you women nurturing children in the world
when I so casually whirl my polished hair
crop top hiking up my iron-flat abdomen
Forgive me sweet ladies
you women who were fifty
when I was twenty
you women rising, thin-lidded and lined
as I saunter by your commuter wheels
nearly naked, fresh breasted and easy
Will you vindicate me
kind women who were fifty
when I was twenty
for the times I fluttered my wicked lashes and smiled coyly
at anyone, maybe your lover,
perhaps your husband
I pray you absolve me
good women who were fifty
when I was twenty
you women warriors scarred by life’s weaponry
if my flipping fingers and cheeky laughter
interrupt your seasoned reflection
your focus on work, on family, on meaning
on all I will not know
and can not know
until my car is stopped at a red light
and I watch myself saunter by
regretting how I never once thought of you

joy august ripsaw

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14 thoughts on “Forgive me, dear women who were fifty

    • thank you, John
      I always wanted to write a piece like this without making it too – “woe is me, I’m getting old thing”
      this came to me the other day and I thought this sort of accomplished the task
      and yes, I hate to admit “a bit of an apology” and a bit fantasy also – you know gotta make those words work😊
      am:)
      hope all is going well with you

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks for asking, all is well here. my lower back is better, hope it stays this way. Work is OK but I’m considering retirement in a few months. Since the divorce, my finances have improved significantly!

        Liked by 1 person

      • well, fine Sir John-
        it would appear you are doing really well, and I’m so very happy to read you are!
        sorry about the back – but glad you’re improving
        am:)

        Like

  1. Beautiful work AnnMarie! I am feeling a little better. Finished my ‘Friday The 13th’ book. I can’t wait to do the second one and I feel it will be just as good if not better than the first. But like I said I will try out other genres for a bit for a breather. Hope you had a good eve. AnnMarie=Number One! wo hoo!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is really intriguing because of the point of view from which it’s written: an older woman (not old! simply old-er) looking back at her life, remembering what it was like to once be “their age.” And what I really like about it is how the narrator/persona takes herself to task – dammit I like that. Sometimes writers and poets remember themselves too fondly (I think) rather than shine a clear, true light on their subject (the past). But here’s the weird thing: for readers, a writer who tells the truth, who sometimes takes herself to task, who shows warts and all – readers end up feeling closer to the writer, are drawn in to the writer’s world/life. It’s a good lesson for us all, I think, to occasionally (not always) say, “You know what? I was a real shit …” and then proceed to tell our guilt without trying to cover for it, just laying the truth on the table, laying it bare. Gosh, I didn’t mean to go on like this, but I see how effective your method is here and I’m envious seeing how you’ve done it. Good job, AM, great job!

    Liked by 1 person

    • wowa, thank you, DS
      funny, I sometimes feel unkind – when I think back to all those women who must have been struggling with different facets of life – while I was being a jackass – (keeping in mind of course artistic license taken to make prose more colorful) – and not thinking of anyone but myself – it’s nice to grow up and grow old and grow thoughtful –
      I’d been wanting to try a piece like this for a while –
      am:)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. “..it’s nice to grow up and grow old and grow thoughtful …” This is good, AM. The voice is clear and authentic (even allowing for artistic license). I hope you explore this kind of territory — the thoughtful look back– more. I’ve been spending a lot of time there, myself, and it’s good for the soul.

    Liked by 1 person

    • you know Doug,
      when I think back to the non-wrinkled days, I was a different type of leather – a bag loaded with emotional crap – when I think of that girl – I much prefer the person I’ve become – it’s so pleasant being comfortable inside your skin even if it is a bit more beaten from use
      I think your new book is as insightful as it is for the very reasons you mention
      have a terrific weekend
      am:)

      Liked by 1 person

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