love of ava

of all the Hollywood starlets, there is one I adore above all others. my love affair with Ava Gardner began long ago for many reasons. she cried when Hollywood painted out her cleft chin. she didn’t take her appearance seriously. she never trusted her talent. she drank with Hemingway. she lived life without pretense. she lived life. she really lived life. I treasure the lyrics to old man river. Sinatra. she lived on after a devastating stroke. she’s always reminded me of my mom.

(cropped image-couldn’t find photographer name to give credit)

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eyes of magma

new poem, Eyes of Magma, published at HerStory – a purpose-driven creative venue for the unified female voice – love this blog!

what story will this be

Backseat
Waiting
Quiet and low
Steel eyes trapped behind metal car door
Glass window mocking
No view to the street
A world crisscrossed with yes and no
violence and peace
He lies there
On his back
Silent
Thinking about his family, his life, his choices
Circling to this moment
In an unmarked car
Followed from the crime scene
An old-school mafia hit
From another time
Only one commonality
His heritage
The dark looks that placed him in harms way
Undercover
This moment
His wife, his children
Clinging to a backseat
A tale papa may one day tell his grandkids
His ears are his eyes
The men are closing in on the car
He steadies his service weapon
What story will this be

this is a work of factual fiction

I have been on earth already

“don’t even think about it”
why do we say this to children
think
think about it ALL
just like you and your thoughts
me and mine
leap into the mud puddle
don’t worry about your fucking shoes
I do not want to be held back, I want to think
despite this goddamn aging that pins me at every throw
why didn’t I figured this out when I had media looks
you know, the kind that get me liked
a lot more than just my words
it is over now
there are too many images
God, there are millions
all online, all available, all better
lots of bubbling skin, pouting thighs
can’t, won’t go there
feminism and all that
my brand keeps the flesh undiscovered
naked is nothing new
it’s biblical old
now it’s only words, those things that wreak havoc
trashing the outside to make interesting insides
my brain processes volcanic ash
dead and burnt
flowing just to make a matured point
down into the hole
I leap off the stage
beneath sweating red gels
aren’t you
the world yes, “a stage”
a fucking amphitheater
for the” bizarre” and the “normal”
still those hands reach out
I don’t want to be caught
I want to dive into a pit
stop catching me and making it look right
planned, staged
“don’t even think about it”
a body sails across floating hands
cigarette lighters flicker
for someone deserving of butane
your hands touch my flesh
groping and grappling
I squirm for release
I want to remain in the air
I never want to land
I have been on earth already
it is time for a thoughtless vampire genie
to grant my magical release
with selfish abandon
blue-genie-vamp